Have you forgotten what it’s like to control your relationship? Does he make all the decisions? Are you ready to take back the reins and break out the whip?
Men are like horses, and they need to be handled with confidence. If you let them take charge, they’ll veer off the path and start eating your neighbours’ hedge. That’s if they can be bothered to leave the stable at all; when left to their own devices, they’ll sit on your couch watching re-runs of old cop shows and eating hay. That’s why you need to be in control of your relationship.
Ok, so not all men are like horses (and don’t we know it); for one thing, horses are much more athletic. But just like with horses, the battle for control is a very important part of a relationship. Unlike horses, however, men can never (and should never) be broken in. Men need to feel like they are in control of the relationship, even when they’re not. The trick is to take control without letting him realize it.
Set up boundaries
Sometimes people in relationships don’t set up any boundaries because they want to keep their partner on his toes. The truth is that a relationship is not just about two people enjoying themselves, its about both people sharing their lives, feelings and dreams with each other. You need to set up boundaries so that you both can live your life freely and your partner wouldn’t feel suffocated.
“In all of your work, keep one eye on the future and the other eye on the past; then you will never fail.” ~Henry Ford
Set up different boundaries with your partner; you could have a list of what you are not willing to compromise on, and if you can stick to it, you will have successfully set up boundaries.
Most people have to make sacrifices to be together, but there is a limit to how much you should have to give up. If you are the one who is always making sacrifices, turn the situation around and make him sacrifice something for once. If he complains, tell him that a relationship is about compromises, and it’s his turn to compromise.
Just Say No
To be in control of your relationship, you need to learn to say no to your partner. If he makes unreasonable requests or demands, tell him ‘no’ and stand firm. He must respect your point of view and your ability to make decisions for the both of you, so make a statement and don’t back down.
It can be a hard thing to do when you have control issues, and you are a person who likes to be in charge. But there are better ways to deal with control issues than to say no. The right way to deal with control issues is to say yes and learn to let go of control. Saying no when you actually do need to say no is much easier to deal with than dealing with an overbearing relationship.
Sharing the Power
These days, most couples share power and make decisions together; this way, both partners get to wear the trousers. Of course, it’s not always realistic to make joint decisions, but the trick is to be in control of your relationship without making him feel like he’s powerless.
Open up your heart and mind
Opening up to someone, especially if you’ve been in a relationship for a while, will help you understand how you think and how things generally work.
You must understand where the person you see lives and what they’re looking for. By doing so, you’ll be able to open up to them, and you’ll be able to create a closer bond.
You should look at your relationship from a holistic standpoint and open up your thoughts. What are you looking for in a partner? What kind of lifestyle do you have, and what do you want to achieve?
If you don’t understand these, you’ll never be able to figure out whether or not you’re on the same page as your partner.
Make sure that you understand what your partner has been doing, what they expect from you, and what you expect from them. Even if you think you’re not on the same page as them, it might just be an internal issue. Once you get a closer look, it will all be a lot clearer.