Online dating can feel like an endless scroll of faces with bios that say more about their love for brunch than their personality. So, how do you stand out and spark a conversation that leads to an actual date? Crafting that perfect opening message can feel daunting, but fear not! We’ve got you covered.
In this post, we’ll unveil 15 openers that will help you ditch the boring “hey there” and get a fun, engaging conversation flowing on Bumble or Tinder.
How to Start a Conversation on Bumble or Tinder
On Tinder, anyone can start a conversation, but on Bumble, the woman must initiate. Either way, it’s time to figure out how to get a man’s attention on the dating app so you can find “The One.”
Humour is a winning approach. Bumble, Tinder, and Hinge offer suggestions about opening a conversation, and I borrowed a couple of those. Then, I’ve added several of my one-liners to the list below. The idea is to stand out and capture a man’s attention. Many of my coaching clients started out using lame openers. You want to avoid anything that can be answered with yes, no or “good.”
Typical Small Talk Won’t Work.
For example, many women ask, “How is your week going?” This makes no sense because the only answer a man can give is “good,” and where does that lead? Nowhere!
You don’t know each other, so explaining what happened during the week will not be a successful opener. This question is better for people you already know. Once I explained to my clients how to better engage men through the apps, their ability to strike up fun conversations improved significantly.
You want to make a man curious about you so he wants to know MORE about you. That way, he’ll respond, and you can start conversing to see if there’s a connection.
The Goal Is to Get a Date
You need to stand out from all the other women on the app to get a date. Some of these tips for starting a conversation on Bumble are one-liners, and others have a flirty twist.
Put these suggestions as many times as you can and see which ones prove to be the most effective for you. You may, of course, begin by asking a question about something you find intriguing in his profile or photographs. On the other side, there are a lot of men who don’t talk much about themselves, don’t write much, or don’t have much going on in their images. If the usual options aren’t available, use these suggestions instead.
First, there are many short pieces aimed at singles over 50. Those of you who are younger will probably understand and make your own more accurate comparisons. The question “Do you believe Ross and Rachel ever really broke up?” was proposed in a Glamour Magazine article on the TV sitcom Friends.
This works for older singles who watched the show when it aired life and younger people who are discovering the show today on Netflix.
First Bumble Message
1. Coke or Pepsi?
The “Cola Wars” have been going on for decades, and it’s fun to find out which side someone will take. It’s not personal and comes out of nowhere, bringing back memories of a more youthful time for the person you ask.
2. Rolling Stones or the Beatles?
Another great way to recapture a youthful feeling is to take you back to the ’60s and the time of the British invasion (here in the US). That’s perfect for singles over 50, but it is a fun question about musical preference.
3. Thriller vs. Dramedy?
This is another fun comparison based on your TV-watching habits. If these don’t work for you, there are many genres, like legal drama, western, cop show, comedy, science fiction, fantasy, medical drama, etc. Pick your genres or favourite Netflix shows to ask about, and you’ll get a conversation going in no time.
4. Mountains vs. seashore?
Exploring where you prefer to spend your free time can open up a prosperous path for a conversation about vacations, quick trips, and where people feel their best.
5. What’s your favourite pizza?
Some people are purists and like only cheese, while others consider a wide range of toppings, from spinach and broccoli to bacon or pineapple. It’s just a fun question and easy to answer.
Cute First Messages on Bumble
6. What’s your favourite travel destination?
Who doesn’t like to go on vacation? Talking about travel and leisure will likely put someone in a good mood, as time off does.
You can learn a lot about a person’s sense of adventure from where they like to go and if they repeat the same vacation repeatedly or always go someplace new.
7. How do you spend a rainy Sunday?
This question helps you learn about a person’s free time and how creative they get with it. Does the guy watch sports or movies or look for something more stimulating, like a museum? Or maybe they get a few friends together and play cards.
8. What’s your sign?
Asking about Astrology is always fun and such a popular topic today. People love to talk about themselves without getting too personal. Even if he’s not that interested in astrology, he’ll know his Sun Sign.
9. Did you just wink at me?
This is a playful, flirty one-liner meant to get a man thinking. He didn’t wink at you, but that doesn’t matter. Flirting is fun, and this is one way to start.
10. What do you do when you’re not making me melt?
Another flirty opener appeals to his masculine side and ego. Telling a man he makes you melt is flattering and could warm him up to you if he needs it.
What To Say On Bumble – More Suggestions
11. What would you do if you won the lottery?
Here’s how you might learn about his dreams by asking what he’d do if he didn’t have to work anymore or came into a lot of money—pure fun.
12. Jazz, Rock or Country?
Music is a great conversation topic, and this is a classic question. Many men love music and will be happy to wax on about their favourite genres and artists. Having musical interests in common can help you bond.
13. East or West coast?
Everyone has a preference, which is also a way to discover where he’s from. This question is a great example of starting a conversation on Bumble or other dating apps.
14. Tell me two truths and a lie.
I had never heard of this little game, but apparently, it’s become quite popular as a conversation starter.
You’ll have to guess which one is the lie, and you can see how this creates plenty to text about. Be creative with your own responses!
15. Can I buy you a drink, or do you prefer cash?
This old pickup line comes at a man out of nowhere and will get his attention. Another flirty option, the humour in this one-liner, could open doors and start conversations with men you might not connect with otherwise.
Messaging a guy on Bumble or Tinder
You’ve been made aware of what’s going on. Bumble has 15 new and creative ways to start a conversation with a man if you’ve been stumped on how to do so. Because of this, you have no excuses! Take a risk, even if it means putting your life at risk! Using the pizza analogy solely is not a good way to get your argument across. Do not be afraid to use some of the flirting conversation starters that may lead to “The One” and start the magical process of love.
Your energy levels plummet when you’re always worried about finding “The One” and evaluating every man you meet as if he’s that man. As a result, this implies that you are coming from a place of shortage or lack and are anxious that you will not discover the right man for you. As a result, the most important thing you can do is relax, be playful, and enjoy yourself to the fullest extent possible. It’s not a huge issue if a man doesn’t respond—keep going! Many men are online and in applications, and more are joining each day.
Stop ruminating over how to initiate a conversation on Bumble or Tinder, and do it! The sooner you get started, the more likely you will find the love of your life.
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